Missing Memories

Lately, I've been feeling a bit down. We're re-watching Seinfeld because it's the obvious choice when we can't decide what to watch. With each episode, I find myself verifying, "We've seen this before?" Several seasons in, I am realizing that I have absolutely no recollection of any of the content. It seems that I mentally... Continue Reading →

Taking on the Inflamasaurus Hex

Last night, my boyfriend brought up a shocking internet prank where someone finds an adversary's address through their IP address and the places a call to the police departments pretending to be said adversary. The local S.W.A.T. team swarms an innocent victim's home, led to believe that the individual is armed and dangerous. The in-game... Continue Reading →

But You Look Healthy!

In December of 2017, my body begin falling apart. My physical fitness regressed substantially after two years of resistance training progress. I woke up tired and yawned constantly throughout the day, deeply offending friends and family. I struggled to stay alert at work and in conversations, and my acute sensitivity to caffeine slowly dissipated. I... Continue Reading →

That Sneaky Little Bastard…

Last week was relatively uneventful, that is until I started compiling medical records for my new Integrative Doctor. My goodness, there are a lot. My father-in-law, a retired radiologist, reviewed my PET-CT scan back in September and didn't see anything noteworthy. My vital organs were good. Thus, when I received the radiology/oncology report back, I... Continue Reading →

Radioactive Retort

The local hospital just called to schedule my PET/CT scan. On Friday, I'll have a bit of gallium pumped into my system and then spend three hours strapped down while a machine searches my entrails for biochemical anomalies. Since this is a nuclear radiology procedure, I will need to wait patiently for the results like anyone... Continue Reading →

When Everything And Nothing Changes

I've been feeling discombobulated lately. Restless, frustrated, a little bit lonely, and unable to focus. The feeling is subtle, yet intrusive and pervasive to the point of debilitation. I begin each morning with the same routine. I take my blood pressure while reading the day's entry from The Daily Stoic, journal whilst sipping on perfectly milky... Continue Reading →

Lost, Orphaned, and Alone

The most challenging part of my illness is not the hair loss, skin ulcers, or constant nausea. I'm starting to come to terms with the swollen joints and the forced sabbatical from lifting, hiking and cardio. I'm okay with the fact that I'll be on heavy-duty medication for at least ten more months and, quite possibly,... Continue Reading →

Groundhog Day

I spent thirty minutes talking with my infectious disease doctor and nurse practitioner this morning. How am I progressing (or not)? What are my prospects? How does my recovery compare to similar cases? Would a different diet, more sleep, or alternative medicine help? "I don't expect you to get worse," she offered. "Gradually, over the... Continue Reading →

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