sustainable systems & storytelling
After six months of donning a P100 respirator, chemistry googles and nitrile gloves in public, my boyfriend recently mused as to why--of all the verbal assault we had heard about--none had been directed at the most cautious person around. Yesterday afternoon, I received a text stating "It finally happened" and I knew exactly what it... Continue Reading →
This is the true story of Eric, a rather ordinary 40-year-old college professor who believes that mozzarella sticks constitute a balanced meal, women are more mysterious than the elusive giant squid and chain smoking over games of nightmare chess is the best way to spend an evening. Last night, Eric deviated from his normal routine. Rather... Continue Reading →
Today, my boyfriend and I will exchange cards in honor of Female Love Reassurance and Gift Exchange Day and then call it good. Both of us view February 14th as a grossly over-commercialized holiday, yet we both appreciate a good card. At some point today, my sweetheart will open a little miracle card that reads, "I... Continue Reading →
With my boyfriend's birthday fast-approaching, I've been begging him to just tell me what he wants.With each holiday, he insists that he doesn't need anything. I proceed to buy him something really fun or highly practical, and he always thanks me for my thoughtfulness as he insists that we don't need to be spending money... Continue Reading →
Awhile ago, I wrote about synchronicity and today, I'm presenting two more wildly, wonderful synchronicities. But, We Don't Need Anything From Costco! Several weeks ago, my boyfriend and started up a conversation with a middle-aged man at a small cafe. Let's call him Bob. I sat back and listened as the two engaged in a... Continue Reading →
I awoke to a twisted ankle minus the explanatory sprain an invisible rubber band still grasping the purple flesh three-quarters of an inch above my ankle "don't wear socks to bed" the doctor had advised but the words fell on deaf ears and chilly toes now resembling those of a blood-drained corpse
My boyfriend has joked that if I were to die, he would face his own demise within three weeks. Death from a broken heart, you ask? Nope, starvation. I've joked, that if he leaves this earth before me, I'm not going anywhere, and neither is he! Several years ago, he suggested that I would probably... Continue Reading →
The other day, my distracted mind mind was quickly drawn back into conversation when my boyfriend nonchalantly said, "let's get you a hare." After years of back-and-forth about the inhumanity of leaving an oversized mountain dog alone in a small house without a backyard for 10 hours a day, the possibility of him suffering through... Continue Reading →
One of my boyfriend's favorite bands is in town for two nights this week. Many months ago--back when I could sometimes stay up until 9pm--he bought a set of pit tickets...for both nights. Now, he's in a bit of a pickle. Should he sell the two sets of tickets and pocket the $600? Should he go... Continue Reading →
In spring 2015, I was diagnosed with valley fever and pneumonia. I was on bed rest for over a month, during which my boyfriend picked up the habit of scrunching up his forehead and saying, "I think you're losing it, dear." He would smile, kiss my forehead, and shush me as I rambled on about... Continue Reading →
Imagine a five-foot-nothing Italian with a heavy accent, oversized nose, and enough stories to ensure you always circumnavigate away from his porch if you're in a rush. His goodbyes involve kisses on the checks and finger-wagging reminders that he expects to be invited to the (eventual) wedding. This is my dear, elderly neighbor, Nico. Four... Continue Reading →
My boyfriend is a bit of a smartass. Whether pranks (like the April Fool's Day he convinced his father that Costco was closing and my mother that we were expecting), puns (which his mother refers to as two-thirds of a pun--a "P U") or miscellaneous silliness (like caressing my hair with a creepy "little hand"... Continue Reading →
It began years ago. I was ten. My parents had taken me and my brother to the children’s theatre to see Puss in Boots. It was a great show. I loved it. My mom even bought me a plush Puss with removable boots. I couldn’t have been happier, or so I thought. I ate my... Continue Reading →
I begrudgingly signed up for online dating on a Sunday. I wanted to try it so I could knock it all I wanted. Good guys are hard to come by, dating sucks and I needed an excuse to give up. Within hours of signing up, I had received dozens of messages, mostly “hii beutiful” and... Continue Reading →
I love you. I love you more. I love you most. I love you times infinity. I love you to the negative one-twelfth... which is the sum of all natural numbers... which is actually greater than infinity. Quantum field theory, quite simply, my love. I win. Goddammit.
