A Love Letter To Myself (And To You)

In my early twenties, I developed the habit of drafting up little love notes on particularly lonely days, leaving them tucked inside library books and waiting on park benches. I never stuck around long enough to see the recipients, but I always felt so much happier and more connected after my secretive love bombs. Maybe the young man who flunked biology will read, “You are enough” and feel a little better. Perhaps an overworked custodian will find the poorly-drawn smiley face paired with “Have a great day!” and crack a smile.

As I navigate through nausea, pain, and disappointment, I’ve secretly been hoping to stumble across such a note. I’ve been wishing and waiting for some kind stranger to remind me that things will get better, entirely forgetting that I have the full capacity to write such love letters to myself. Amongst the paradox and uncertainly, I’ve been chasing after an endless light that has been shining within me all along.

Below, find a letter addressed to me, and to you, and to anyone who is secretly seeking a small act of love from the universe. Here is your sign. You are loved, very much so.

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Hello, my love–

Let me just begin with the reminder that you are the stunning aftermath of explosive stars, flung into the universe by a giant supernova, and then launched towards the planet earth on the backs of comets. When you look into the mirror, I hope you recognize the wonder of the cosmos in your radiant eyes. When you question your purpose in life, I pray that you remember just how bizarre and miraculous is truly is that any of us are alive on this habitable spinning orb.

I want you to remember that you are loved, worthy, and enough. Sometimes you may feel like a loner and a failure with no hopes of redemption, but that’s just your mind playing tricks on you. The love that surrounds you abounds, and the love that lives within your heart is infinite. Just as your mind can manipulate you into feelings of self-loathing, you can inversely twist your mind into feelings of self-love.

I need to remind you that the relationship your develop with yourself is the most important relationship you’ll ever be in. You, my dear, are married to yourself, for better or for worse, in sickness and in health, for the rest of your life. Wouldn’t it be perfect if you loved waking up to that person every morning? Self-love is the only channel by which you can love others, fulfill your purpose, enjoy your life, and create your reality. Every day, focus on what you can do to fall more in love with yourself. You are the only person you have power over, but–oh man–you have so much power!

You have a big heart and good intentions, but you don’t need to constantly write and re-write the script for your life. Stop replaying conversations in your head, lamenting you health challenges, and blaming others for their shortcomings. This is your life. You picked it up off the shelf in “as is” condition, so accept the way things are and work with what you have. I hear that ripped knees and elbow patches are fashionable right now, so own your imperfections.

Dear, I know that you continually revisit the past in search of lessons, but after a brief review, you need to let go. Release what was and make room for what could be. Apologize for hurtful words and work to repair broken relationships, but say goodbye to anything that is beyond fixing and move on. The past is a wonderful teacher, but it should not be your only guide.

I think you have realized by now that you are responsible for shaping your own future. There will be no substantial change unless you prioritize your relationship with yourself, learn to stand your ground, and find the courage to pursue your seemingly unrealistic goals. Behind your shy demeanor and quiet voice lies an all-powerful goddess. Never hesitate to summon her strengths in support of your journey to self-awareness, self-love, and self-assertion.

Life is hard at times, I know. You need to change your narrative from one of scarcity, depletion, and survival to one of abundance, deep self-respect, and awareness. By shifting your perspective, you will begin attracting the life, people, and opportunities that align with that frequency. Sure, you will encounter instances of ill health, failed relationships, and disappointment in your self, but the key is to always find the lesson and then rise above the problem. Use each difficulty as a stepping stone on the path to becoming your best self.

Love, consider this question: Who could you be and what might you create if you were truly standing in your power, rather than shrinking from it? What would change in your life if you said “yes” to yourself, bravely welcoming aliveness and creation into your every day? These are big questions and it’s okay to take time considering them, but I hope you soon discover that you have the power to achieve anything you can dream up, so long as you continually pair tenacity with your open heart.

Hey, I know that change is tough. It’s alright to embrace a slow, sustainable pace. As long as you’re consistent, your commitment to self-love and personal evolution will allow for real and lasting transformation. Like the classic example of a caterpillar going inward to discover its true beauty, so too can you begin your evolution. Right here, in the center of your pain and your joy, is where you can light the fire of initiation and discover the answers you’re seeking. You’re on the right path, my dear. You are on your own unique journey.

The path of life isn’t one where you find a rock on the side of the road and then sit on the sidelines until you die. Rather you must choose–over and over again–to begin a love affair with yourself, and then sustain that passion for living. In case you didn’t know, you deserve to create and enjoy a passion-filled life that resonates with your soul and brings you to life. You deserve to be loved, to feel alive, and to experience abundance on a regular basis. And you are capable of creating this reality, no mater who has told you otherwise.

You are powerful beyond measure, and you are whole. You are living out your hand-picked “choose your own adventure” novel, and the challenges you face are simply plot twists on the journey to your personal fairy tale ending. You deserve a story that aligns with the beating of your heart–a story with a happy ending. Hang in there. I promise it will get better. And then worse. And then better again. But you will survive, and you will be stronger for it.

Dear, I know that you’re hesitant, fearful of making the wrong choice. Let me remind you, gently, that indecision is also a choice. Please remember that action will set you free. And it all begins with you. Make the decision to love yourself, fully and shamelessly. You’re the lone dandelion in a grassy meadow, waiting for the opportunity to grant your own wish and spread small gestures of love out into this vast, open world.

Take note here. Everyone, yourself included, is doing the best they can with what they have. Forgive others and, even more importantly, forgive yourself. When one thing changes, everything around it is affected. People will come and go from our lives–including versions of yourself you’ve yet to meet–and we must love all of them for exactly what they are, and appreciate them for the particular elements that they bring into our lives. (They, too, are a unique arrangement of cosmic star dust.)

So, my love, here’s to falling and staying in love with yourself, your truth, and your life! Here is to writing simple, flowery, and corny love notes to yourself (and to others) whenever and wherever you need a little pick-me-up. Here’s to rebuilding yourself from the ground up, no matter how many times you’ve been burned, and to standing proudly in your own unique power. Here’s to the kind of love that always has the last word over fear.

May your heart always remain open, ready to receive all of the love that it deserves. And may you become that love, and then spread it like wildfire.

You are loved & you are enough.