Moments of Questioning

I want few things, but they all seem so unlikely: to uncover my truth, manifest my innermost thoughts, and capture your heart. And I can’t help but wonder if that makes me irresponsible to pursue all at the same time. I am gripped by the uncertainty so often that it makes them all seem foolish.

But then there are moments of being so sure: where I forego sleep and uncover a new story inside of me, when I lose a whole day trying to capture a former fleeting thought, after exploring distant destinations and the same familiar streets with you. These moments bring the same assurance as the earth hinting at the coming fall (it will surely come), taking a flight without a plan (it will surely be grand), drifting aimlessly on a boat in the middle of a lake (this is surely where you are meant to be).

For so long, it has seemed that life is just waiting to begin. For so long, I have believed that real life would manifest itself the second I cleared the obstacles: a difficult decision, unfinished business, time to be served, a debt to be paid. I’m slowly coming to realize that the challenges and indecision are just as important as my victories and success. This is what I’ve been waiting for–to feel something.

These moments of fierce passion and debilitating hesitation offer equal opportunities to incite change; they help us recognize and embrace what matters most in our lives. If you’re ever feeling stuck or uncertain of what you’re meant to be doing, don’t give up. Do whatever it is that captures your heart, go wherever you lose track of time and listen to your inner voice. These moments of questioning shine light on our personal truth and intensify the conviction with which we move forward. Always remember to continually move forward, to continually bring yourself into alignment with your truest path.

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